Entitled Star*

In the year 2020, the people of Earth finally realized the stark inequalities that permeate the arts and entertainment industries. Suddenly, people began to clamor for the sound of diverse voices, voices of the downtrodden, the historically disempowered individuals, stories not like those of WASPs, but, like murder hornets, that had not previously been brought to the attention of mainstream white America with such great force and vigor.

Access to funding began to dry up. Those with independent wealth suddenly encountered reduced demand for their creations beyond their own willing communities. Thus, we here at Entitled Star saw an opportunity, an opportunity to create an artistic statement, music extremely out of tune with our present moment, a spectacle of sorts for those who get it.

We seek the whitest, most privileged, perhaps also least talented individuals, preferably lacking artistic vision of any kind, and, on top of that, we wish to project their creations worldwide, constantly, and in incessant waves such that there is no escape.

Here is a representation of our creative process, the work of one of our first clients, B.E. White. We present them in After/Before order as our process is extremely regressive. We are, however, planning a series of Instagram tutorials to expand access to the method. We’re literally going to pay people to post them on your timelines. We call them Mechanical Jerks.

At some point, we believe, people will come to learn about the aesthetics behind it. We see ourselves as the dark shadow of the brighter movements seeking to bend the moral and material worlds toward justice. Much maligned, we preserve in the knowledge that our acts of absurdity actually propel those movements further, providing them with ample ammunition to discuss what is wrong with the world and to galvanize previously depoliticized persons to participate in their movements and to support artists that are part of those movements. We are the backlash and the dissuasion. We are Entitled Star.

Recent Productions Include: The Wide Eyed Peas, whose two smash hits Where Is the Gov. and Support the Police reached number one and two on the charts simultaneously despite massive unpopularity; Eeyore Heard A Nazi, which was scrapped in preproduction after word of its existence leaked, but created a global viral media s***storm (any publicity is good publicity, especially when you work at Entitled Star); and our greatest constellation, which we can finally take credit for: a significant contingent of the Trump Administration, which is (un)fortunately temporarily undergoing remodeling, perhaps recasting for a 2024 relaunch. We are optimystic that we will, when successful again, have become a parastatal agency as of 2025 when we manage to take power again.

^{*Entitled Star is a subsidiary of The Antisocial Network.}